sacrifice.

"with sacrifice, one will learn patience."


yes.


my uncle once told me : " siapa yang hidup senang di dunia yang tidak ditimpa dengan apa apa masalah, adalah orang yang tidak mudah untuk masuk syurga. ini kerana Allah swt selalu menguji kita dengan menurunkan masalah masalah tersebut supaya dia boleh tahu berapa kuatkah keinginan kita sebagai hamba hambanya untuk menyembahNYA."



today, started off as hell.


i woke up with a fever and my head my pounding like mad.

i forced myself to the shower. and off to work.(forgetting to perform sembahyang subuh)


at work, i was sooo.. tired because last night i slept late. and my boss was complaining away..
i felt miserable due to my unwell condition and i was soo caught up with my status that i forgot to perform zohor.


then, the worst struck, i thought i already had suffered enough mental and physical torture. then she msged me, forcing in negativity into my chest. now im emotionally tortured too.


but then, something struck me. i told her it was alright and gave her a reassuring tone eventhough it was a dark time.

i put down my phone and went to perform asar.


during asar, for some reason, i cried all the way.


i literally cried my heart out during asar.


after asar, i sat in the prayer room and reflected upon my day.

i asked allah for guidance. i asked for him to strengthen my patience. to help me through my dark times. to brighten my heart.


right then and there, i felt a WHOLE LOT better.

alhamdulillah. alhamdulillah. alhamdulillah.


this was an eye opener for me today.

it shows that HE is most powerful.most forgiving.

______________________________________________________________


dear 'arifah,


i hope you are reading this. i have no idea what you are feeling now. but im pretty sure its extreme sadness. i felt it too dear. it kills me inside when you said that. i was at a lost for words. but i want you to know, what ever happens. she is your number one priority. you need to listen to her. dont worry bout me lah.. leave me for last.. im un-important.. family comes first. when she says do it, you do it ok? yeah, the pain inside my heart overwhelms me.. to hear that she.... yeah.. i really thought that she would approve of it when you msged me yesterday night.. i was very sure.. but there was this feeling in my gut that tells me.. sooner or later.. something was gonna happen.


'arifah, i want you to know that, no matter what gets thrown away, i assure you. i assure you that my love for you DOES NOT.


please dont give in to grief dear. please be strong.



like i said. dont worry about the price of the item or whatever not.

i...my family.. did it for you. with full sincerity.


=)




awoosh out!


i love you dear.